Story by Thomas Fuller – Manatee Mysteries
Our church was located in the most serene, pastoral setting just East of the Braden River. It was surrounded by lush, green expanses of pasture and bordered with oak, pine and palm trees. The grazing cattle didn’t seem to have a care in the world and enjoyed a peaceful harmony with the many birds that made the property home.
On some mornings, a soft, thin layer of misty fog held tight to the ground and, combined with the majestic sunrise, gave birth to a glorious day.
And then, one morning, like a deep scar on a pretty face, the first donut appeared. There, in the middle of the lawn, was a circular gouge about fifteen yards across. It looked like a plow tied to a drunken horse had been dragged through the grass. The pristine property had been wounded. The beauty violated. And it was just the beginning.
In the months following, dirt donuts became more creative. From circles to figure eights to what at times seemed like attempts at initials, the property came to resemble a war zone. Unless it was the work of aliens who may have gotten bored making crop circles, I suspected some young punk in a four-wheel drive pick-up as the perpetrator of all the destruction. But who was it? Due to the isolated location of the property back then, it was highly unlikely that this mystery would be easily solved. But then, something highly unlikely came along.
One Sunday morning, we arrived at church to discover that our donut delinquent had reached new lows in his campaign of carnage. His target was the retention pond, and as he spun through the goo he also managed to cover one whole side of the building, windows and all, with a thick coating of mud. It was a mess, and still no clue as to who done it!
Well, following the service that morning, one of our members, a highly respected officer in the Manatee County Sheriff’s Department called me aside. With his hands behind his back, he said, “Pastor Tom, I have a gift for you.” He then presented me with a bent up, muddy license plate. Evidently, the donut man’s rear bumper had become wedged into the bank of the retention pond. When he pulled away, the plate was separated from the bumper and left behind as evidence. I was told that officers had already been dispatched to a nearby farm where they found, of all things, a muddy pick-up with a missing plate, a teen-aged boy, and a really embarrassed dad. Mystery solved.
That marked the end of our donut dilemma. Evidently, he was the sole perpetrator. I don’t know what became of the young man. He seemed like a good kid. Perhaps he had a calling to be a landscaper that was just a tad bit misdirected. I do hope that it all served as a good lesson for him. And, I have to tell you, he cleaned it all up.
